The previous article bent on using your mind, putting it to use. But then, problem arises when we think, but wrongly, for the mind has in itself the elements of right and wrong. Take for instance, someone wants to travel out of the country to study and believes it’s the best thing to do, another believes he doesn’t have to go that far just to acquire knowledge, and someone disregard the two opinion, stating education isn’t necessary. If we call these three personnel to an interview or a debate, they will have their points and you will have a hard time judging the case.
To a reasonable scope, everyone have reasons for whatever they do and don’t have reasons or genuine reason for other things they do, especially when it is copied or in the state of a standby custom, everything sure have a reason except we don’t know.
That reminds me of a story I read in a book about a woman who prepares a ham for dinner by cutting off both ends. Her bewildered husband asks why she cuts off the ends. She replies, “That’s how my mom cooked it.” Well, it just so happened that her mom was coming for dinner that night. So they asked her why she cut off the ends of the ham. Mom replies, “That’s how my mom cooked it.” So they decided to call grandma on phone and ask why she cut off the ends of the ham. Her answer? “Because my pan was too small!”
This story is hilarious to me as two generation did something because they saw someone doing it and only the grandma had her own personal reason for that. Now let’s say the granddaughter has a big pan, yet cutting off the two ends of the ham?, then I rest my case. The best thing we can do is ask questions and know reason to things in both minute event and other great events.
For everything, have your own resolved reason, or you will be tossed to and fro and see yourself following the crowd and lost in the crowd afterwards. A lady wants to cut her hair because someone else did so and it was befitting, you don’t know if she is suffering from one illness or the other that warranted that to happen. Or a guy suddenly started this greedy habit because his friend just got a car, do you know how he got it or the reason for getting it? Don’t you just follow the crowd.
You are likely to talk yourself to death giving reasons for everything while raising your kid, in short, she is likely not to understand. But as time goes on, she will learn to understand the reason why she was forced to do some things and afterwards do it deliberately and wholeheartedly.
To think right you’ve got take some things into consideration.
What you want to do, is it going to affect someone else? Is it as a result of revenge? Is it to show off? Is it to prove yourself or compete with someone else?. If your decision hits any of these things stated, you really don’t have to go for it. Your friend who happens to be your junior at work offended you and you have the opportunity to punish him, when you do that, that shows your weakness. Only a strong man will see and overlook an offence. You have a better option to forgive, go for it. When you learn to live void of bitterness and anger, it strengthens your decision making.
What you are about to do. Is it for pleasure? Or better put, unnecessary pleasure?. Sometimes, pleasure can be needful, just to cool your head and refresh. But at this point, do you really need it? Will you rather allow your house to burn down while you go get a cup of coffee? You sure won’t do that.
When you’re angry, something burns in you and you just want to say something bitter, think about it, what happens after spitting the word out? Will it solve the problem or make it even worse? Can you overturn it? What effect will it have on the hearer or the other party with whom you are bitter towards?. It takes inner strength to keep evil words from escaping through your lips. In this case, it is only better to keep quiet. Not because you don’t know what to say to hurt the person as he has hurt you but you counted the cost and saw that it was not worth it.
Is your decision playing around what people will say or think? When your decision is based on what people will say, one day you will be left alone and you will see clearly that nobody really cares. This doesn’t mean you should live a I-don’t-care attitude, don’t forget whatever you do must not affect someone else. But in this case, learn to make up your mind and do what you want to do not because of pressure or the selfish opinion of some people. Now, know that it is very important to seek counsel and hear what people have to say, the opinion of your friends et cetera, but it is still your choice to follow it or not. Jim Rohn in one of his seminars after stating his opinion concerning a certain issue said “Listen to me, listen to them, make up your own mind, be a student, not a follower”. Learn to filter opinion, take the good side of it. A friend of mine once said, “ when you listen to anyone talk, separate the wrong things from the right things”. Everybody can’t be right in what they say, it is only left to you to pick the right thing. The other side of this is, don’t be stubborn in your decision making, think through, don’t be pressured and don’t be stubborn to reconsider your decision.
Where does your thinking faculty lies, where are your morals coming from? Who are the people surrounding you? When you walk with the wise, you end up being wise. Where does your believes lie? Do you just believe every quotes you see? Some things just seems right but they aren’t. I will only recommend the Holy Bible, every quote in it, every phrase, sentence and stories are true, it is tested and trusted. You can make your decisions and set your life according to the words written in it. When you do this, everything you do will be right and you will be successful, as a lady and as a gentleman.